Planning an Independent Surrogacy Journey

Choosing an independent surrogacy journey allows intended parents and prospective gestational carriers to build a relationship based on trust and shared goals. Without a matching agency coordinating the process, however, both parties take on greater responsibility for navigating the legal, medical, and financial aspects of the journey together.

At Foster + Bloom, we partner with intended parents and gestational carriers to create a strong legal foundation, helping everyone understand the process, protect their interests, and focus on what matters most: building a family together.

Planning an Independent Surrogacy Journey

Choosing an independent surrogacy journey means taking a hands-on approach to planning and coordination. Without an agency guiding the timeline, intended parents and prospective gestational carriers work closely with experienced professionals to complete each milestone in the right order and create a strong foundation for the journey ahead.

While the process may seem overwhelming at first, breaking it into clear, manageable steps makes it easier to navigate. Here’s what you can expect as you plan your independent surrogacy journey.

Step 1: Build Your Independent Surrogacy Team

One of the first steps in an independent surrogacy journey is assembling the right team of professionals. Without an agency coordinating the process, experienced advisors help keep each stage organized, legally sound, and moving forward. Your team will typically include:

• A Surrogacy Attorney: Each party should have independent legal counsel to explain state laws, negotiate the surrogacy agreement, and protect their individual interests.
• A Fertility Clinic: Your IVF clinic will oversee medical screenings, embryo transfer, and the clinical aspects of the surrogacy process.
• A Mental Health Professional: Psychological evaluations and counseling help ensure everyone is prepared for the emotional and practical responsibilities of surrogacy.
• An Escrow Provider: An independent escrow company manages compensation and reimbursable expenses according to the terms of the surrogacy agreement.

Bringing these professionals together early creates a strong foundation for a smoother, more coordinated surrogacy journey.

Step 2: Find the Right Match

A successful independent surrogacy journey starts with finding the right match. Whether you are an intended parent or a prospective gestational carrier, building a relationship based on trust, mutual respect, and open communication is essential before taking the next step. Independent matches often happen in several ways:

• Existing Personal Relationships: Some journeys begin with a family member, close friend, or someone the intended parents and surrogate already know and trust.
• Online Communities: Others connect through surrogacy-focused websites, social media groups, or online matching communities.
• Professional Referrals: Fertility clinics, attorneys, and other family-building professionals may also introduce intended parents and prospective gestational carriers who are pursuing independent arrangements.

Once you’ve connected, take time to discuss expectations before moving forward. Topics like communication preferences, decision-making during the pregnancy, compensation and expenses, and the relationship you hope to maintain after birth should all be discussed openly.

Honest conversations early in the process help build trust, align expectations, and reduce the potential for misunderstandings later.

Step 3: Complete Medical and Psychological Screenings

Before any contracts are drafted or medical procedures begin, both parties must undergo thorough evaluations. This phase ensures that the prospective surrogate is physically and emotionally prepared for the demands of pregnancy. The screening process typically involves:

• A Comprehensive Medical Evaluation: The intended parents’ IVF clinic will review the prospective surrogate’s medical history, obstetric history, and overall physical health to provide clearance.
• A Clinical Psychological Screening: An experienced mental health professional will meet with the surrogate (and her spouse or partner, if applicable) and the intended parents.

These meetings are designed to be supportive, helping everyone explore the emotional dynamics of surrogacy, clarify relationship boundaries, and prepare for the unique milestones of the pregnancy.

Step 4: Create an Independent Surrogacy Contract

Before any fertility medications begin or an embryo transfer is scheduled, the intended parents and gestational carrier should finalize a comprehensive surrogacy agreement. This contract outlines each party’s rights, responsibilities, and expectations before the medical process moves forward.

Do Both Parties Need Their Own Attorney?

Yes. Each party should have independent legal representation to review the agreement, explain their legal rights, and ensure their interests are protected. Once the agreement is negotiated, signed, and notarized, the attorneys can provide legal clearance for the fertility clinic. A surrogacy agreement typically addresses important topics such as:

• Parental rights and intent
• Compensation and reimbursable expenses
• Medical decision-making during the pregnancy
• Insurance coverage and unexpected circumstances

A carefully drafted agreement helps prevent misunderstandings, protects everyone involved, and creates a strong legal foundation for the journey ahead.

Step 5: Move Forward With the Medical Process

With the legal contract finalized and cleared, your fertility clinic will guide the surrogate through the medical preparation for the embryo transfer.

During this phase, the surrogate will follow a precise protocol of medications to prepare her body. The embryo transfer is a quiet, hopeful milestone where the intended parents’ embryo is placed in the surrogate’s uterus.

Once a pregnancy is successfully confirmed through blood tests and early ultrasounds, the surrogate will eventually transition from the fertility clinic to her local OB/GYN for standard prenatal care. Throughout this time, maintaining regular, warm communication helps nurture the unique partnership you’ve built.

Step 6: Prepare for Birth

As the delivery date approaches, your team will shift its focus toward preparing for the birth experience itself. This involves close coordination between the intended parents, the surrogate, and the delivery hospital.

Your attorneys will work with you to establish a detailed birth plan. This document is shared with the hospital’s social work and labor and delivery departments to ensure everyone understands the unique nature of the birth. A well-prepared birth plan outlines:

• Who is permitted in the delivery room during labor and birth.
• Who will make medical decisions for the baby immediately following delivery.
• How the baby’s hospital wristbands will be assigned.
• The coordination of private rooms for both the surrogate and the intended parents after the birth.

By communicating these details in advance, you ensure a respectful, peaceful environment for everyone at the hospital.

Step 7: Establish Legal Parentage

After your child is born, the final legal step is establishing or confirming the intended parents’ legal parentage. While the process varies by state, completing this step helps ensure your parental rights are fully recognized.

How Is Legal Parentage Established?

Depending on state law, your attorney may obtain a pre-birth order, a post-birth parentage order, or recommend another legal process, such as a stepparent or second-parent adoption. The right approach depends on where the child is born and your family’s unique circumstances.

Working with an experienced surrogacy attorney helps ensure every legal requirement is completed correctly, allowing you to focus on welcoming your child and celebrating the newest member of your family.

Accounting for State-Specific Surrogacy Laws

Surrogacy laws vary significantly from state to state. The laws where the intended parents and gestational carrier live, as well as where the child is born, can affect important aspects of the journey. State law may determine:

• Whether a surrogacy agreement is legally enforceable
• The requirements for establishing legal parentage
• Whether compensated surrogacy is permitted
• Who is eligible for a parentage order

Working with an attorney who understands the laws in the relevant states helps ensure every legal requirement is addressed before moving forward.

Get Legal Guidance for Your Independent Surrogacy Journey

Planning an independent surrogacy journey means taking an active role in building your family’s future. Having the right legal guidance helps ensure every agreement, parentage process, and state-specific requirement is handled with care.

From drafting surrogacy agreements to establishing legal parentage, our team is here to help you move forward with a strong legal foundation and the support you deserve.